


Countdown

by LazarusII



Series: Star Wars One-Shots (Basically a Collection of Obi-Wan & Ahsoka Fics ) [4]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Anakin Skywalker Needs a Hug, Angst, Countdown to ROTS, Gen, Human Disaster Anakin Skywalker, Memories, Mention of Satine - Freeform, Obi-Wan Kenobi Needs a Hug, Obi-Wan Kenobi is a Mess, Post-Old Friends Not Forgotten, Pre-Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith, Pre-The Phantom Apprentice, Unresolved pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-23
Updated: 2020-04-23
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:40:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23810215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LazarusII/pseuds/LazarusII
Summary: On the bridge of theNegotiator, Obi-Wan feels the darkness rising, as though suddenly he is out of time...
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi & Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker
Series: Star Wars One-Shots (Basically a Collection of Obi-Wan & Ahsoka Fics ) [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1703224
Comments: 13
Kudos: 135





	Countdown

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! 
> 
> I wasn't 100% on which ship they were on, so I just made it the _Negotiator_. Also, this has not been beta-read, so please be kind to me!  
> I'm still not fully recovered from last week's episode so I have /no idea/ how I'm going to survive tomorrow's episode. 
> 
> Hope you all enjoy :)
> 
> ~LazarusII

He stood on the bridge of the _Negotiator_ , watching the stars streak by. How small he felt in comparison to the darkness of space, as though he and the ship were one small entity on a very large world. All around him, the engineers and technicians, all key crew component of the ship, bustled about in a state of nervous excitement. Tension hung in the air, saturating every corner of the cruiser with a kind of contagious euphoria. 

They were going to Coruscant, to the heart of the Republic.

They were going to battle. 

Obi-Wan closed his eyes, leaving his body behind and allowing his consciousness to drift upward. Soon, he no longer could hear the soft hum of the deckplates, or the buzz of many voices at work. Their lives were specks now, a collection of small lights in the vastness of space. 

Unease rippled through the Force and he focused in on it, struggling to make sense of what only seemed like garbled messages.

Every time he drew closer to an answer, shadows seemed to thicken, obscuring it from vision and drowning his senses. Images, far too blurred for him to see, flickered through his mind's eye. 

A terrible sense of dread filled him. Even months ago, he could meditate and see the light... but now... 

Now, the light seemed like a small candle, burning at the end of a dark tunnel. And it seemed only a matter of time until that candle was snuffed out. 

Withdrawing back behind his mental shields, Obi-Wan felt memories pushing against his conscience. 

Guilt. 

Sadness...

Betrayal.

It was so much to take in. 

He struggled to comprehend what had happened even in the last few hours. Even now, a part of him still felt as though he were still planetbound, surrounded by cannonfire and death, listening to Anakin barter his own life to lure out the tactical droid. 

_That was hours ago, Kenobi._

_This is war, remember that._

_There will never a moment's silence until it is over._

He remembered the feeling of relief when the 501st came in, melting through the droid army with a practiced ease...

But then the aftermath... 

Everything was still so pale in comparison to what had happened then, from the moment that Yularen had summoned them back to the cruiser.

The hologram.

Ahsoka.

Bo-Katan...

The urgent plea from Coruscant.

And then the terrible calm before the storm.

How desperately did he want to turn back the clock and take back those precious seconds, to speak to his former-Grandpadawan and forget the war. He'd felt much of the same manic happiness as Anakin, but had chosen to veil the emotion behind decades of control and discipline. He'd been cautious. 

Maybe, now he realized, a little _too_ cautious. 

Either way, he'd watched it all fall apart before his eyes. 

Ahsoka was bitter. Bitter towards the Jedi; bitter towards him. He understood that anger, that deep-seeded sense of betrayal.

He'd failed her, even after arguing for countless hours to ears already turned away. He could've done more, _should've_ done more.

In the months following Ahsoka's departure, he'd thrown himself into the war, one hand gripping his own sanity and the other reaching out to Anakin, hoping to help his former-apprentice hold back the darkness which had slowly been creeping towards him. Powered by guilt and pain, he'd clung to the war, anchoring his mind and body to battle--his duty.

Satine, he'd lost her, and he was losing everything else too. 

The war had stretched him thin. No longer could he sleep without feeling the bone-aching fatigue which tore at his strength. A new panic had taken root in the past few weeks, a fear that once he closed his eyes, he would never awaken again. 

He could feel a similar pain in each of his men, Cody most of all. Moments of enthusiasm were few and far between for the Clones of the 212th, for how could one celebrate and feel the thrill of battle when the survivors grew so few? 

And Anakin, Obi-Wan's closest and dearest friend--his brother--was slipping as well.

If he, Obi-Wan, was feeling the exhaustion of the war, it was nothing compared to that of his former-apprentice. The shadows beneath the man's eyes had grown, the lines on his face deepening. Some days, when they had been on a long campaign, Obi-Wan would look at Anakin and see a shell, listless and exuding a kind of suffering that he could not identify. 

He wanted to help Anakin, but the conversation would never pass a superficial "how are you?" The answer was always the same, passive and simple: "I'm fine, Master." 

Anakin would instead point out Obi-Wan's own pain, ordering that that Kix and the other medical officers chase him down, demanding that he take better care of himself. 

Seeing Ahsoka had been the highlight of Anakin's life since she'd left, but Obi-Wan had still felt crushing sadness fill the Force the moment that she'd departed.

And now?

Now, Anakin was conflicted, torn between the joy of seeing his apprentice, and the realization that Ahsoka was no longer the person he'd remembered. 

Obi-Wan breathed a deep sigh, pushing back emotions that he couldn't quite place. Echoes of Bo-Katan's words floated into his mind, a snarl birthed by frustration and pain. Guilt rolled across him, realizing that, though she knew the truth, he had failed. 

_'I thought she meant something to you.'_

Anakin's confusion, his uncertainty in the moment, still unable to comprehend the depth of the Mandalorian's words. No, Anakin didn't know. Obi-Wan hadn't shared details of what had happened, especially details surrounding what had happened to her... 

And coming back to face the Council's frustration and anger at his disappearance only had caused more friction. He'd acted on his own and with emotion, an act which was considered taboo, especially for someone on the Council. 

The stars seemed to dim before his eyes. 

_Satine._

But what had felt like a punch to the gut, a knife twisting beneath the armor plating around Obi-Wan's heart, had been the subtle agreement in his Grandpadawan's eyes as she looked upon his pain. Her silent agreement with Bo-Katan's words. And, later, her accusations...

_She didn't know._

No matter how many layers of mental shielding he'd thrown around himself, Ahsoka's icy words had broken through every one. He felt small, suddenly helpless in the face of an impossible choice. Mandalore was where his heart had always been, but even now it was under attack, its people paying a price that was his doing. He'd failed to kill Maul. 

And it was all to easy to imagine losing Ahsoka in the same way--another victim caught in the crossfire between himself and the renegade Sith. 

For a while, Obi-Wan mulled it over in his mind, attempting to collect himself. He was exhausted, the constant need for rest pulling at every muscle in his body. 

...

Manic laughter distantly met Obi-Wan's ears, causing his heart to lurch.

He was still floating in the Force, poised on the delicate bridge between the light and dark. 

Once more, the laughter rang out, but this time it was closer. Obi-Wan reached out, searching.

It almost had a face, almost... 

_Something is coming, something terrible._

A sense of foreboding overtook his mind. 

The first person he thought of was Ahsoka and her mission, set against near-impossible odds. He wanted to help her, to be there for her... 

_Maul. It has to be. Maybe something has happened..._

But the Force whispered warnings without words. 

_No, it's not Maul... It's something else._

_Someone else._

A hand dropped onto his shoulder, nearly sending the esteemed Jedi Master flying into the ceiling from surprise. 

Blinking in slight irritation, he turned, an eyebrow raised. 

"You okay, Master?" Anakin asked innocently, cocking a half-smile. 

"Yes, yes," Obi-Wan huffed, "I'm quite alright, Anakin. What is it?" 

His former-apprentice's smile faltered. Obi-Wan didn't need the Force to tell that there was a roiling sense of uncertainty and stress behind Anakin's expression. 

"The Admiral thinks that we should start prepping the gunships. We'll be arriving shortly."

Obi-Wan closed his eyes, once more feeling weariness crash down on his body like a tidal wave. It was time. 

And so he put on a smile of his own, reaching out to Anakin's shoulder. 

He nodded. "Alright. We might as well get a head start." 

As he retreated from the viewport, he threw one more glance over his shoulder. The stars looked the same--still reduced to long white slivers as the _Negotiator_ continued its frantic race back to Coruscant--but he couldn't help but feel that he'd missed something. Something _important_. 

Obi-Wan took a deep breath and attempted to balance his mind once more. 

_It's just another mission_ , he told himself. _Everything will be fine..._

But the Force whispered back a message of its own, a soft message in the corner of his conscience, warning that he was standing upon a ticking clock--

\--And that, very soon, he would be out of time. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! You can find me on Tumblr [here](https://lazarusii.tumblr.com/)  
> All comments, corrections, kudos, etc. are welcome :) 
> 
> Please stay safe everyone! 
> 
> ~ LazarusII
> 
> PS: Again, I am _not_ ready for tomorrow's ep.


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